|
Andria Kaler
|
 |
« on: October 23, 2007, 10:41:08 AM » |
|
Basically we all know that God doesnt like divorce but what if the husband has been emotional abusive and negelect full of his wife, and after trying to talk to him it was seen as "Oh I guess its that time of the month". Now to make it worse she does gets the gutts to leave he tries to manipulte by guilt and fear of Gods judgement only to find out he wants her back only beacuse of a child. Bye the way they have been married for 6yrs.
Should she stay with him as a nanny. Or should she leave and have a life of happiness?
BTW it is not me just a question.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Brandy
|
 |
« Reply #1 on: October 23, 2007, 12:55:30 PM » |
|
I would like to know how abuse- physical, mental, emotional, etc. plays into it. The only thing I've found in the Bible releasing a person to divorce is for infidelity. But I can't imagine God would want someone to stay in an abusive situation.
Any experts out there?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Overseer
|
|
« Reply #2 on: October 23, 2007, 02:32:07 PM » |
|
I said what to who now?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
"Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming. This is a fault.
Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope."
--Oscar Wilde
|
|
|
Bruce Blagg
The Silverback
Administrator
Full Member
 Offline
Posts: 334
Prrrrr
|
|
« Reply #3 on: October 23, 2007, 03:24:51 PM » |
|
In recent studies that I've been doing (and I haven't finished with them yet), I have found that the Bible allows for divorce based on three general categories:
First is adultery (found in Deuteronomy 24:1, and affirmed by Jesus in Matthew 19). The second is Emotional and Physical neglect (found in Exodus 21:10-11, and affirmed by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7). The third is Abandonment and Abuse (included in neglect in Exodus 21:10-11, and affirmed by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7).
As one author wrote, "As in any broken contract, the wronged party had the right to say, "I forgive you; let's carry on," or, "I can't go on, because this marriage is broken." Therefore, while divorce should never happen, God allows it (and subsequent remarriage) when your partner breaks the marriage vows."
There is a great article entitled "What God Has Joined" published by Christianity Today. It is about five pages long and explains a lot of the theology behind these three causes. I found the article will done, but have not had time to do my own independent study of his references. You might be able to find the article on their web site.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Brandy
|
|
« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2007, 12:21:58 PM » |
|
Say you get divorced for one of these 3 reasons. Is remarrying okay or would this be considered adultery, as many teach?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Michelle
Global Moderator
Full Member
Offline
Posts: 562
Smile!!!
|
|
« Reply #5 on: October 24, 2007, 04:03:10 PM » |
|
I actually had the same question as Brandy.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Bruce Blagg
The Silverback
Administrator
Full Member
Offline
Posts: 334
Prrrrr
|
|
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2007, 03:42:06 PM » |
|
The three reasons allow for remarriage. However, I think a caution has to be expressed. Figuring out who is the guilty party in a marriage can often require more wisdom than Solomon's. These three causes where allowed to protect the innocent party. Sometimes there are no innocent parties. But when there is, then the Scriptures allow for them to get away from the source of pain and restart their life.
The other point to consider is that divorce is never possible without sin being present. Usually each of parties believe that the other is the guilty one. I usually recommend that if a divorce is the election, then the person who considers themselves offended should sue for the divorce on cause and not just on irreconcilable differences. Irreconcilable differences is not one of the reasons. If there is a question of who has sinned, then this should be agreed upon by the parties, or they should agree to arbitration by a third party, or legal action through the courts.
Lastly, I believe that emotional abuse is very real and very bad. I just don't know though if everything being called abuse today really is. I have talked to people who have been told that when their spouse says their stupid then they are being emotionally abused. In some cases, this is correct. In many cases, it is not. And in a few cases, it is simply a statement of fact.
I don't want to confuse things, but I also don't want to make this seem easier than it is. I've never seen a divorce but what all parties involved (including families) are hurt by it. Many times both parties are at fault and have grieved the Holy Spirit in their lives. But when the reasons listed above are valid, then God understands (he doesn't necessarily like it, but He understands), and those in these situations should feel free to end the relationship and begin again.
Hope this helps. Maybe it is more like rambling and just mudding things up. But it is what is on my heart.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Brandy
|
|
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2007, 03:56:05 PM » |
|
What if the blame lies on both parties- and the problems don't fall under one of those categories, but one is willing to try and work things out and the other isn't? And, does it really matter how a divorce is filed? Most people file that because it's quicker. I read an article on cnn. The author of the commentary thought so. But does it matter? Here's the article for anyone interested. The title is: Saving Marriages Must be a Priority. http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/10/24/roland.martin/index.html?iref=newssearch |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
